I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
I tapped out to boredom. She bought me a full meal at Subway. Two tap beers and a pretty weak long island iced tea. I'm five dollars cheaper to fuck than she is.
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
i told her she would have to blow me everytime we lost a game of beer pong, she never noticed i purposely hit our opponents in the face every other shot
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
I just realized that at some point last night I told someone I would only be friends with 16% of them because the other 84% stole my people's land
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
Randomize