yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
I like my sex mixed with concussions.
Flowers- 20. Dinner-50. Drinks- 25. Hotel- 150. The look on his face when I tell him I'm on my period? Priceless.
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
I looked at her and said "I now pronounce you pumpkin tits"
I've made out with men from every corner of the globe. Sex-wise, I've almost conquered europe. Take that napoleon
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
He sent me a meme at 3am. Usually guys just send me booty calls that late. I think I'm in love
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
Well you went to the bar with your crutches last night & everyone including the DJ started chanting "put your crutches in the air"
FYI bail money is still in my drawer. I know you have no car but you need to know this for tomorrow.
Randomize
