Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
I walked in on you eating olive oil off of a plate. you gave me this look and I just started crying. we were that drunk.
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
I drunk dialed my ex-boyfriend last night. He was sitting next to my new boyfriend. Shoot me in the face.
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
We were escorted through the guys dorm by 5 kids with nerf guns and zelda shields. I felt like the president with a fucked up secret service squad.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
Note to self: if you decide to go to the gym when you're coming down from your day high to shoot some hoops, do NOT play pickup basketball with the big black dudes who need a sixth
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
It's not christmas until we're acting sober in front of grandma
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
Randomize
