def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
I've heard awesome things about their margaritas. I also may buy a mustache from party city. Would you do me with a mustache on??! Hahahaha. But, really.
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
I made it crystal clear I'm only upset because he's not anywhere fit to be a father of my unborn zygote
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
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