You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
He's unconstrained by sanity, physics, or his liver.
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
Randomize
