Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
dude I just realized something - girls return my clothes washed so in thought bringing girls home is like avoiding going to the laundramat
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
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