i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
Is putting "Tonight I'm Fucking You" on my date playlist too forward?
What happened to my face?
You kneed yourself in the eye during the Harlem Shake.
It was impressive.
don't care how drunk i am. my dick was like "nope, not doing it, you can't make me and i was like oh yes i can"
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
If its not for food we ain't going out.
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
Randomize
