you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february...
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
First time at a gay bar. I found a surrogate AND sperm donor! The surrogate is straight, so it evens out.
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
My mother is a bitch. She just outed me to my dad. He wants to meet you by the way...
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
What’s the level of adulting when you reschedule a dentist appointment to have a threesome?
Randomize
