i permit you to call me
it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
also Jesus you really need to change your diet. I just washed your baby gravy out of my hair and it's so acidic my hair is damaged. You have killer sperm
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
Randomize