the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
There are some things you can ever unsee. And walking in on your dad jerking off is one of those things.
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
I got inside last night via doggy door
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
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