This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
judging from the number of limes and box of kosher salt on the counter therell be 8.5 gallons of tequila drunk this weekend.
sounds about right
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
I just sat in the bathtub with the shower running so I could eat the whole box of mega stuffed Oreos. What am I doing with my life
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
He was all “please don’t bail because I’m missing work for this” last night
Honey no, I need dick. I’m not going to bail
Randomize
