I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
Looking for things to spread butter on. Found men's briefs in garbage can. Lost insurance card. Summer has finally arrived
If i ever start ordering tequila again please tackle me to the ground and steal my wallet
Today is all about not throwing up, where the fuck are my keys and does anyone know what happened to that guy in the panda suit my roommate had sex with last night.
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
We are all done wearing pants today
Can you please venmo me emergency money? i have no pants.
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
It's very disconcerting to wake up and she is gone. I never know where she could be. It's like playing wheres Waldo but Waldo could potentially be drunk and wandering around in weird places that normal Waldo's don't go.
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
Randomize
