You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
He was spoon feeding me wine all night.
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
No, but I woke up here and my pockets are full of raisins. Like 6 different pockets.
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
Seriously just confirmed via our bathroom scale that a keg weighs 170lbs
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
Randomize
