It's like God shit irony all over that family
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
Just got a voicemail from a guy referring tp himself "as chest hair guy". If I'm coming home to a intervention I understand.
I just found my "random bang list for summer of 2012" that I wrote last night.. It's written on a Plan B receipt. If this isn't irony I don't know what is.
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
he high fived his dick after we had sex
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
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