me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
Now that we have successfully procreated, I need to know we are on the same page. Please tell me you are aware that there are whole seasons of our lives that our child can NEVER be made privy to.
We should probably write this down. That's a shit load of shit.
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
Like its not even midnight and I've already had enough of her for all of 2015
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
This is the worst drive ever. Im hungry, hungover, i gotta shit so bad, and the only radio station im getting clearly is playing alvin and the chipmunks christmas songs
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
Randomize
