Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
Also, we accidentally donated a bong to goodwill
Just found the cutest bag of coke under my bed. I'm going to get fucked up and bleach the cat vomit out of my sheets.
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
Update on my sex life: my calves are sore from masturbating too much. It's a thing. Look it up.
She’s the kind of asshole whose face I want to put on a T-shirt just so I can go outside and burn it.
Randomize
