Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
You stole her cigarette screaming that you were going to stop the air cancer from getting everyone.
at least i was looking out for everybody
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
When your boyfriends ex-girlfriend texts you to see what you're wearing to his sister's wedding that you were not invited to, nor knew about. I think it's time to call it quits.
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
Hurricane Harvey ruined my dick appt. WTF?!
Randomize
