Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
She definitely pulled a diaper out of her purse and cleaned up the vodka with it, where do you meet these people?!
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
I really appreciate you taking the time to blur out my excessive boob cleavage for instagram
Apparently I handcuffed myself to the dishwasher...
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
Randomize
