butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
quitting drinking is the number 5 new years resolution but number 4 is enjoying life more which one do you think im going to pick
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
Dude, fuck the siberian warm up. You can't put vodka in hot chocolate. Learn from my mistakes
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
Mark my words I will never date another cop again. I don't care if he's JESUS.
IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO HIT THAT, AND YOU DON'T, I WILL FUCKING CRUCIFY YOU.
You're such a supportive sister.
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
She left a cookie cake on my porch, and the frosting reads "I'm sorry". She left me an I'm-sorry-for-punching-you-in-the-face cake.
Randomize
