I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
He talked to you for like two seconds while you were shit faced doing Forest Gump impressions...how is that possible?
Lock the bathroom door next time you are going to masterbate with the shower head, okay?
I was just power-washing my vagina.
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
You can't break up with me. I brought you to see Beyoncé.
To me, you're the Patron Saint of good music and handjobs
I think he thought I was too drunk to handle his parrot
MY BUTT IS BIG ENOUGH FOR AN ANACONDA AND HE DOESNT GET TO ENJOY IT TOUGH SHIT
Seriously, you just banged the guy that wishes his dog happy birthday on fb. That's fucking adorable!
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
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