On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
The dog just did a longer kegstand than anyone at the party
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
Did I happen to mention where i left my keys when I drunk dialed you last night
You have not lived until you've seen your mother stumble into the house with one shoe on mumbling incoherently about tequila cupcakes.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
We went to Olive Garden so high we didn't talk and managed to be awkward enough for the waiter to ask if it was our first date
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
Vocabulary what?!? Shakespeare is my bitch.
if I hear Wonderful Christmastime one more time I'm putting my foot up Paul McCartney's ass.
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