LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
Just convinced airport security that im sober. All i do is win.
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
I have 39 hot sauces from Chipotle
It's like earning obesity badges
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
Rule number 1 of dorm living: do not forget your butt plug in the bathroom.
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
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