Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
I feel like royalty, that girl from last night had a vajazzled vag. Bucket list complete.
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
So yeah, don't be alarmed when you come home after work to find me eating cookie dough out of a margarita glass with a knife and watching The Little Mermaid. It's been one of those days.
Thank you for deleting me from Instagram. Also, I'm carrying your child. Happy new year!
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
Apparently I handcuffed myself to the dishwasher...
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
Apparently I bought a laptop last night, then gave the laptop to a friend who was going to give it to her friends' friend to put some cool shit on it. Anyway, I have no idea where my new laptop is now.
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
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