great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
so I finished the entire bottle...next thing I know, it's 8 am and I wake up on the fucking beach in the low tide with a family standing about 30 feet from me just staring.
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls
You know I'm having a rough day when I'm curled up in the corner eating Spaghettios.
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
Randomize
