But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
Just heard this lady walk by on her phone saying "did everyone orgasm?"
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
Who had my phone last night? Whoever it was sent "Fuck you, you're adopted" to half the people on my contact list.
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
He told me he wished he could shrink down to a small size so he could live inside my cleavage
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
Someone just asked me if I was chewing red hot gum.... I'm LITERALLY SWEATING OUT FIREBALL.
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?
Randomize