drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
I am a mess. Weirdest thing: I woke up with a hammer under my pillow. No idea why.
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!
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