Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
You kno how some people just need a "everything will be alright" pat on the back? I need an "everything will be alright" blowjob right now. Come over
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
I just wanted to tell you that the German word for "dickhead" can also be translated as "ass violin" and I think that's beautiful.
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