I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
the russians are downstairs with the vodka loudly proclaiming happy birthday america. i don't care if it's the fourth, i care that it's 9 am and they woke me up.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
I need a "closed for the season, thanks for a great summer" sign for my vagina
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
Randomize
