You really coming over, don't trick.
your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
i just overheard my mom tell my dad he should drink less so he could hit the right hole
I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
Giving me the bigger bowl of ramen isn't considered "romantic"
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
Come over and play the Jeter 3000 drinking game. You drink if the commentators say "captain" or "3000". I'll drink if they say "overrated" or "past his prime".
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
It was like in the Christmas carol when the guy pulls his robe back and 2 small children appear... except this time it was a massive scrotum
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
Randomize
