He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
the toilet has never flushed louder then when you sneak home drunk and try to avoid your parents hearing you puke.
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
She danced with a broom while telling me I was "cool as shit" and she "wishes she could take a portion of my big ass and attach it to hers" then she passed out
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
Randomize
