I hate the hobo that sits outside our building
Joe or Chris?
do i even wanna kno y u kno their names?
well i came home drunk one night and Chris offered me a beer as i was coming in, it was kinda weird but i wasn't goin to deny a free beer. you're proolly talkin about Joe though, he's the one with the fucked up eye.
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
All my credit cards need to be pressure washed
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
New rock bottom. Woke up at 7 am fully clothed in a bathtub full of water. I hate myself.
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