I feel bad for the person that has to clean the dishes that I peed on last night.
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
After you vomited on the patrol car, you thanked the officer for helping you up off the ground. I don't think you realized you were being arrested.
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
Ya i'm marrying the man who can hear/smell this level of flatulence and stick around
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