im about as happy as oj after his trial
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
He snuck into some random hotel's continental breakfast at 3 AM and then passed out on a bench in the lobby. When the cops found him they made him empty out his pockets. No phone, no ID just muffins.
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
I have to bobbypin his pubes for us to have sex. The other day he wanted me to braid them.
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
My house is about to be spotless and the only person visiting is the plumber and not the porno kind.
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
I just bought spray paint, a T-shirt, and a box of magnum condoms. The cashier refused to make eye contact! Haha
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
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