Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
I'm going to preface tonight by saying that I'm sorry for tequila, shopping carts, and having to chase me.
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
I tried to fuck you in my bathroom while my parents were in the next room. I am a clusterfuck of fun.
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
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