ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
And then I interrupted the father of the groom, to ask if she was "ballet or pole" in the middle of his story about his niece, the dancer.
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
thanks for paying me in special brownies...but brownies dont pay the rent...anymore.
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
But see that's the thing. I know i'm better looking than you, I just want you to be continually in a state of shock and awe that you could ever get a girlfriend this hot. You know?
Haha! You know I mean that in a positive way. Like, "let them eat cake!" Or in our case, "let them achieve obesity from the two entree plate at Panda Express!"
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
My doctor actually said I was suffering from an "acute hangover" in doctor's note I asked him for....what a douche
Randomize
