i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
A hefty woman and I mean hefty shoved her number in my pocket at the gym without as much as a hello, winked and kept walking. Going to use your bed to defile her, don't want her to know where I live or have my neighbors see! Thanks, you're a pal!
So the other day we finished having sex and he literally said "what are we going to do about your vagina?" Like, I hadn't even dismounted him yet.
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
Randomize
