Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
his mom walked in while I was blowing him. he turned around in panic and accidentally punched me in the face. i have a black eye and only half the clothes i came here in. can you give me a ride?
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
my cockatiel has aquired a taste for beer. I should not be allowed to own exotic pets.
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
I need to stop getting so drunk at bowling
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
Randomize
