Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
Just had perfomance review. I was told the best example of my integrity was when I told my boss I was going to fail the random drug test due to my weekend coke binge. She said that took a lot of character.
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
Blood and glitter go together right?
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
I was just shot with a dart gun by one of my coworkers while walking to the printer. Ironically I was printing my resignation letter...
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
I'm going to stop at grocery on the way home. I'm CRAVING wine from a sippy cup. We have neither wine nor sippy cups.
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
Randomize
