My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
I SHIT YOU NOT a mailman helped me leave without waking him up.
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
I got all the way to work before I realized there were Trojans in my bra.
Randomize