so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
I feel like your standards for women is like rent-a-centers standards for credit.
apparently i ate an entire bag of goldfish, kissed some guy with a girlfriend who now wants to kill me, made my sister sleep in my bed with me while i wore no pants, and told my whole family i am pregnant with jonny's devil baby...never drinking again
i can't believe i had my finger in that
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
just wokeup with my ethics textbook on my chest, animal crakers in my mouth and my dick in my hand. even aristotle doesn't have a theory for this one
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
Dude just slipped a $20 into the jukebox at that restaurant we were escorted out of last Mardi GRAS. Hope they enjoy Justin Bieber's Baby cause they're gonna hear it 40 fucking times.
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
Ugh hungover at a laundromat is a terrible feeling. For some reason I keep getting sucked into staring at the clothes spinning around and around and it makes me want to profusely projectile vomit everywhere
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
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