there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
I had a dream last night that I had to pretend I liked Dave Matthews Band to impress this girl I was talking to.
I guess it was more of a nightmare.
Going to a party tonight. Sorority girls will be there. Primary goal of the night: make one cry. Secondary goal: become a father.
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
I'm one bad relationship away from owning seven cats.
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
Because, after all, nothing quite says life in 2020 than doing laundry at 9:40 on a Friday morning to make sure you have masks and underwear.
Randomize
