there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
I've only been here for an hour and I've already made 6 babies cry.
Happy Birthday
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
She handed me scissors and told me that they were the ones with the lowest probability of having been used to trim someone's pubes.
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
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