I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
I sent her a picture of Richard Nixon and said "these are the only dick pics I send".
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
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