No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
I answered the my mom's phone call about what we're doing for father's day while he was still fucking me. She thought I seemed really excited about his hiking boots present.
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
He's trying to marry me, when is the appropriate time to tell him my real name and that Dallas is a completely fictitious slutty alter ego? I need the advice of someone with morals.
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
Let's put a bunch of beers in a backpack and shotgun them in a Red Lobster bathroom
I forgot about snapchatting a pic of us, but I remember flossing with your hair.
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
I asked him to tell me a bedtime story, then threw up on him.
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
Randomize
