I have to look really hot tonight because my personality is going to suck.
I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
george bush was a better president for first pitches than barack obama. there. i said it.
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
Thank you. I woke up with a beard hair in my mouth. Super classy.
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
These tits shall not be calmed
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
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