Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
So I tried to call my phone from his phone and was like, "hey, my name is not in here..I thought you had my number" turns out he has my number saved as "gives good head"
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
He has in a pan: ten pieces of bacon, two cloves of garlic, an egg (not scrambled or hard boiled, just an egg) and frozen corn.
Heaven was on the 3rd floor and Hell was on the first. When the cop walked up he was confused as to who the noise complaint was for and wrote both apartments a noise violation.
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
My mom just asked if I wanted a mimosa when I got out of the bath.
I think everything's gonna be okay.
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
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