i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
Let's paint friendship bongs
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
As the bouncer was escorting you out, you yelled "keep your filthy dick beaters off me!"
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
I'm so baked, I spent the last hour trying to screencapture the cracks on my phone.
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
I put on that one song on Titanic so he'd fall asleep. When I was positive he'd passed out in a drunken fit, he outstretches his arms and says "I'm flying, Jack.."
Randomize
