Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
I am sending my doctor an XXXMas card thanking him for my tits!
To be clear, the next time I wake up with your dick inside me, I will reach down and grab one and squeeze until it pops like a grape. You've been warned.
I got Pilsbury cinnamon rolls for us to have tomorrow, but I don't have the willpower to leave them in my fridge overnight, so I am eating them all and getting us more in the morning
I love you more by the minute
Throwing up while listening to NPR because I’m trying to adult through this hangover
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
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