eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
May God have mercy on my new vibrator.
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
Found your dick twin last night
As I am reading this. I'm standing in my underwear eating taquitos. I'm saying this in the most loving way possible: FUCK OFF.
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
Over 50% of the drunkest nights I have ever had began with me saying "I'll just drink my dinner" to you.
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
My plan to hit on all your friends went to shit after the 3rd dirty martini.
Randomize
