3 deer just ran past us on the street. At least I get to see some tail tonight
Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
I think my vagina is haunted
She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
Just got booed while taking a piss and asked if I 'call that a penis.' Get me the fuck out nf yankee stadium.
i just got a fart via voicenote. blackberry has officially changed history.
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
I sharted in my sleep... I didnt even think that was possible.
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
During your work shift I was either: a) stoned. b) high. c)stoned. or d) high.
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
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